For as long as I can remember I was unhappy with my weight. I struggled with an eating disorder when I was in high school, and somewhere along the way I lost myself.
I became I person I didnt know or like. I hurt the people I cared the most about, and I did things I can never take back.
Eventually, my parents put me in therapy. I wasnt happy about it, but it wasnt really up to me. I think maybe because I wasnt ready yet, I didnt recover properly. I never learned healthy eating habits, and my relationship with food was probably no better than it had been before. No, I wasnt starving myself anymore, instead I did the opposite. I ate because I was sad, I ate because I was bored, I ate because it was there. So years after my “recovery” I found myself overweight and just as unhappy as I was before.
I gained and lost 20 pounds many times, but it never stuck. So I tried to drown my sorrows in vodka. It didnt work. Pretty much every weekend I was out getting hammered. That led to a lot of really embarassing moments, and was no help to my waistline.
For me, the turning point was the summer of 2009. I went to Seattle with my boyfriend at the time to meet my best friend and her husband for a Kenny Chesney concert. I wore the same outfit all weekend because I wasnt comfortable with how I looked in anything else. When we got home from that trip I knew I had to make a change.
I started slowly, taking the dog for longer walks, riding my stationary bike, and not buying any ready made meals. I had just moved out of my parents house, and had full control of what type of food was within my reach. This was a big help for me.
Then one day towards the end of September, I just happened to stumble upon a food blog. That was when everything changed. Something clicked, and I knew the answer to my problems. Eat real food.
I started slowly cutting out processed foods. I stocked my fridge up with organic veggies, and started drinking a Green Monster every morning. I also started running again. Since then, I have lost 30 pounds (never once letting myself go hungry) and I finally feel like me again. I’m also proud to say Ive lost the weight without joining a gym. I hate the gym, hate it. Everything about it bothers me, driving there, finding parking, the fact that walking in there is like a high school reunion, and the $50 a month price tag.
I never thought I’d be able to lose weight, and maintain it without joining a gym. Im proud to say Ive proven myself wrong.
Of course I still indulge. I also dont have any foods that are off limits. Ive found that for me, Im not so interested in white bread anymore, and as far as sweets go, I dont crave them as much. Still, if I want chocolate Im gonna have some chocolate! 
And because I know its everyone’s favorite part, here are a couple of pictures of me before:
And here I am now:
If we’re being honest, I’d still like to lose a little more, but its not even about the weight anymore. If I stay where I am, Im ok with that. I feel good, and thats what really matters.
Welcome! I'd love to hear from you: leah *at* whydeprive *dot* com
I love this – I love it. I’m so proud of you, Leah. You’ve come so far since we met. We both have. I’m so thankful to have you in my life and I hope you realize that. Miss you and Love you – LOTS!
Oh wow – you know I just read this!! Amazing story. You are amazing girl
I’m so glad I followed the link from Lisa’s blog (I’m an Okie) to yours…your story is so refreshing and I can’t wait to read more! Thank you for putting it out there!
You’re quite an amazing and courageous person.
you look gorgeous and happy and I happy for you!
Wow! You look amazing. What an inspiration. I enjoyed reading your story and felt I could relate a little bit.
Thanks for sharing your story! You look fantastic, be proud of your achievements!!
I am SO proud of you! Reading your story is definitely inspiring me to do the same… eat real food, and stop depriving. Thanks Leah
I just stumbled upon your blog today. Amazing! You are very inspiring and without the gym too! That’s rare to hear nowadays. Good for you!
You look great! As does the cute…. rabbit?
I’m with you, it’s not about “dieting” or anything, just real food and a healthy lifestyle.
Eleanor
just found your blog. loving it.
i really liked your concept of eating real food. your progress is impressive.
i am in the process of changing my habits. still a long way to go, but am happy with the progress.i can relate to your story.
you are inspiration.
just stumbled across your blog!
such an inspiration for me! your progress is amazing.
I love your blog! Just found it and man can I relate to your story. Not only have you defeated/conquered your past, but you’re living as an inspiration for everyone! Looking so forward to reading more!
Just found your blog and its awesome! To be honest you look gorgeous in any of your pictures, but it’s great that you feel good about yourself now. I think simply “eating real food” is a very powerful thing!
Your blog speaks to me. I can relate to a lot.
I, too, had an eating disorder in high school.
I also gave up under-eating for over-eating.
I get hammered every weekend. Sadly, that is where I stopped. I have yet to get healthy.
I go through these waves of highs and low. I eat all “real foods’ and avoid processed food and cheese and whatnot. I exercise. I lose 15 pounds. Then I start buying pizza, mac n cheese, crappy food, all over again.
Reading your blog, though, gives me inspiration!
Thank you for sharing, it makes me want to get off my butt and move
Also, you look great!
i can really relate, during my recovery period and i have days where i am just over eating on the wrong foods, it is hard to go from completely deprived to having so much to eat